Wednesday, April 29, 2009


I've gotten all the required signatures for my thesis, which means it's green light for me to laser print four copies to be sent for jilid-ing (what is it in English eh?).

Despite the good news, I'm pissed off today. I'm not sure why. I know it's the PMS playing with my hormones, yet I don't think I should be blaming it all on PMS.

I want to enjoy the moments after passing up my thesis, but really, I feel like shouting profanities all over the place.

Excuse me, you cannot reach her on the phone, why can't you call me? I don't exist in the house?

If it weren't for the guests, I would have confronted you then and there.

I feel so stupid for trying to defend you in front of the person who despise you the most.

I feel so stupid that I ended up arguing with him, just because I wanted to protect you.

I feel so stupid for wanting to end one of the things I treasure most in my life right now, just because I thought he was being too much.

I feel so stupid for feeling bad at times when I couldn't take you out along with everyone.

I don't want to feel stupid anymore.

You're walking on a thin line, don't you know that?

But no worries, when the time comes, I'm not going to opt for revenge. I'm not childish like you.

I'll do it face to face. Without the presence of anyone else.

Then it will be all fair and square.

And it won't make either of us feel stupid.

Trust me.

I'm not going to let you off easily. As if I'll let you treat me like an idiot.

I'm not afraid. If I'm fucking afraid then I wouldn't be hiding and writing this in a language that we understand.

I'm not such a coward.

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